I know I am incredibly fortunate to have an amazing Dad who has always been there for me. He didn’t mind when the midwife told him I was a girl (I am the second of two girls), he held my hand promising to never let go when I was scared, he checked for monsters under my bed and he wiped away my tears when I had nightmares. He took pride in my achievements and never made me feel like a failure even when I definitely had failed. Even though my Dad is the epitome of an alpha male, he did my hair for me in the mornings before school and was my go-to when I wanted fashion advice.
I know my Daddy is not perfect but I will forever be a Daddy’s girl because he has never given up on me and because he has taught me so many things that have shaped the woman I am today. Among many life lessons some of the teachings I hold dearest to my heart are…
1) Girls can too
From the youngest age my Dad treated my sister and I without gender bias. He didn’t stop us from doing something because we were girls, whether it was playing in mud, wanting to be around him when he was doing DIY or taking part in sports that girls are often discouraged from, my dad supported us in doing whatever it was we chose to do. My favourite place to be was around Dad, which was probably perpetuated by the fact I was an RAF brat meaning he was often away for periods of time. My Dad taught me how to use a saw, how to put a shelf up, What different DIY tools are and how to re-paint rooms. He taught me how to cast a fishing line, how to sow seeds and how to ride my bike. When my sister wanted to join a local martial arts group Dad didn’t try to stop her, and attended every competition he could, cheering her on even when she was sparring against boys. I could never thank my Dad enough for never telling me I couldn’t do something because I was a girl.
2) How a man should treat a woman
There is no mistaking that my Mum is my Dads Queen, because he absolutely dotes on her and when it comes to anniversaries, Christmas and Birthdays he pulls out all the stops to make sure she feels special. He will buy her a bunch of flowers for no reason other than to show her that he loves her and even during times when my parents had no money he found ways to show his devotion. Dad gave me a high expectation of what to expect in a man.
3) The pleasure of the natural world
Long Walks were a big part of my childhood as it’s a cheap way to keep children entertained. We’d walk through forests, around lakes, through fields, and across cliffs. Early on I knew the difference between an Oak leaf and a Birch leaf. I giggled and shrieked rock pooling for small crabs and starfish and you would have never caught me calling a Swan a duck like I hear some children doing. My Dad grew up on a farm and although at 17 he left the farm to join the RAF, the farm nor the countryside ever left him. I feel blessed to have received a childhood filled with country pursuits such as blackberry picking and hiking and my Dad was a big part of providing me with those experiences. At the age of 21 I left home and even today as a grown woman it’s hard to find something that will capture my attention more than a nature documentary or to find me with a bigger smile on my face than when I am immersed in the countryside. I can only hope that I manage to pass down to my future children the same passion for the natural world.
4) Whatever you do, make sure you work hard
You won’t come across a bigger workaholic than my Dad. He often pulls 70 hour weeks and has never shied away from a hard days graft. Even on his days off of paid employment you’ll rarely see him sitting down watching TV. On days off you’ll find my dad doing DIY around the house, tending to his allotment, ensuring his Bee hives are well or doing one of his many hobbies which at the moment is green bowls. Sitting idle was one thing Dad could not tolerate and was the only thing we would come to blows over because I was very good at doing NOTHING as a teenager. I realised I was indeed my Dads daughter when I got my first job at the age of 16 and became a workaholic myself. Overnight I morphed from a lazy teenager into a woman who chased a bigger pay packet pulling in as much over time as I could around my A Levels. During university holidays I worked two jobs covering 12 hours a day on a regular basis, and even now I’ve settled into office work and paid over time is a thing of the past I work extra hours every day. Dad taught me to take pride in what I do, and to be proud of working hard.
Musings of the Incomplete Quitter 